Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!

Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco!

Yo mama so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her

Yo Mama So Poor:

that your family ate Cornflakes with a fork to save milk.

they put her photo on food stamps.

when I visited her trailer, 2 cockroaches tripped me and a Rat tried to steal me wallet.

she waves an ice lolly around and calls it Air conditioning.

burglars break into her home and leave money.

when I told her about the last supper she thought the food stamps had run out.

the building society repossed her cardboard box.

she watches television on an Etch-A-Sketch.

each night she goes to KFC to lick other folk’s fingers

she can’t even afford to go to the free clinic.

when I saw her kickin a can down the road I asked her what she was doing….’Moving’ she replied.

I caught her trying to use food stamps in the Gobstopper machine.

when I rang her doorbell, SHE said ‘Ding-Dong’

I asked her where the ‘facilities were’ and she replied – “Pick a corner…ANY corner…”

I visited her house, tore down the cob webs and she screamed – “Who’s tearing down the drapes!!!!”

I walked into her home, asked if I could use her toilet, and she said “Sure thing, it’s 4th tree on your right…”

only time she smelled Hot Food was when a rich bloke farted…

when I saw her wobbling down the street with 1 shoe, I hollered – “Lost a shoe?”, and she said – “Nope…just found one…”

she hangs the Toilet paper out to dry.

closest thing to a car she owns is a low-riding Shopping trolley….with a box on it…

she had to take out a second mortgage on her cardboard box.

I went into her ‘living room’, stepped on a Fag butt and she shouted – “Oi, who turned off the heater!”

I once threw a stone at a garbage can, and out she popped saying – “Who knocked???”

I went through her front door and tripped over the back fence.

she does drive by shootings on the school bus.

when she asked me over to dinner I took a paper plate from the kitchen and she groule – “Don’t use the good china”

Yo Mama’s feet so skanky that when your family wants jam pieces, she gets yo brother to run a loaf of bread between her toes.

Yo Momma so Smelly:

the government make her wear a Biohazard warning

she made Right Guard call for backup.

even the dogs won’t smell her.

an old blind geezer walking by asked her ‘yo, how much for the shrimp platter?”

that when she spread her legs, I got seasick…

she wiz playin in my Sand Box and the cat came along and buried her.

her poo is glad to escape.

that standing next to a skunk, the Skunko smells sweet!

that the only dis I’m gonna give her is Disinfectent…

that when you was being born, the doctor’s and nurses all had to wear oxygen masks…

even sewer rats get outta her way…

that farmers use her bathwater as liquid fertilizer…

Yo mama’s underwear is so full of holes that every time she farts they whistle.

Yo mama so nasty I called her to say hello, and she ended up giving me an ear infection.

Yo mama so dark she has to wear white gloves when she eats Tootsie Rolls to keep from eating her fingers.

Yo mama’s so old, her social security number is 1.

Yo mama’s so stupid, it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.

Yo mama’s so ugly, they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.

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